Love Spuds For Sale

I rarely cry at movies
Shed a tear? Not much at all
But I can hand-on-heart admit
'The English Patient' made me bawl

That bit where he goes back to
The cave to see the lady
I didn't really "shed a tear"
I was bawling like a baby

I knew I was in trouble
When my bottom lip went limp
Then I opened up the floodgates
And cried and cried just like a wimp

But I guess that's not so bad
Breaking barriers, knocking down walls
I'm so in touch with my feminine side
That I may as well sell my balls