Fire-Damaged Underpants

I let a massive ripper go
It nearly blew off my pants
It sounded like I just said "Tea?"
And my boss replied "No, thanks"

I just cranked out a wicked gust
It smelled a bit of cabbage
It tore straight through my underpants
And now they're fire-damaged

My manager said "What the hell?"
He's a sensitive wee bloke
I had to say "It wasn't me
But it was my ass that spoke"

I just ripped my under-crackers
With a noise that was quite rude
But I'm proud to have delivered
A fart of such magnitude